Thursday, 8 December 2011

Dear Lover

Dear Lover,
Hear my cry out to you, my thoughts my feelings, desires, all parts, every part I open and share fully with you. I am the carrier of my beloved flame, passions burning in me to share with you, my wounds, baggage all shown and fears why should I heal them for you or myself? All the healing I have done is so deep yet their they are still to be felt and yet empathic as I am its not just mine I feel.

I do push and pull so deep, everything is deeply intense with me. I push myself and you lover as I feel that subtle deep connection and desire. I am always healing shifting and changing the path, journey twisting and turning looping over its self again, yet my path is never what I think or see, it changes so much even the future of mine I’ve been shown, it is never set solid in stone, which I may of shared and held on too, but soon as I grasp its gone, our paths are never what we think they are!

You may give me time to heal and you will welcome me back when I have, is that an expectation of the way I react instead of respond at times like maybe I should! Yet I control what I can and chose never to hurt you and I judge myself more than any other, which if it wasn’t a part of love then we wouldn’t do so to see what is playing out for us!

I remember ancient wars before time began, dragons archangels bearing arms, other places, planets, souls with wounds that came here to be all and feel so deep like never before. Everything is real, alive, even those parts we can’t see with our physical eyes, call it by name what you will its there alright waiting to be seen! We try to escape to other places back home to source, yet there is no going back at all, its here all around and within us! Even through all the evil and darkest of dark I have been, the horrendous roles I played, experienced, the nightmares don’t compare unless one has been there!

I carry all this around with me, its apart of all I am, my soul, I even carry all my partners/lovers before, even the ones who I can no bear never more! As I can never let go, do we ever really do so anyway? They are apart of us whatever, even when we try to disconnect that energy, it is still there only it no longer has the pull or effect over you like it once did, it becomes a story you tell of your life, sharing with others my dear lovers!

I carry that energy with me, no peace to be searched for or found, it exists along when we can just be, stop searching for it its already here, embrace so sweetly with all of you, myself I shall!

My Love can you understand the depth I feel in you and see beyond all eternity, you are but a reflection of me, like all the others around me. What you don’t like in them or makes you upset by them is their within you to be embraced and loved, love the negative, dark and shadow never to be pushed aside!

There is a part of me that expects you to see and feel the deep deep connection that is there for many to see! Go down to all the darkest of places to be embraced and that are found so bright in you, can you be found to be able of understanding me completely? I can accept and understand you, yet it will trigger parts of me that I bare to you unconditionally and yet with conditions that I create, manipulate to allow every part of me to be felt so I can return home in my lover’s arms no longer with a deep longing in my heart of the passionate embrace that bares all before, no places to hide I stand vulnerable and naked before you to be swallowed/ devoured completely by love as never before!

Accept me as I am, I accept as you are only to question and share free expression, no longer wanting to be bound by my fears of what I might say or share, so I lay it all out before you dear beloved I implore of you to receive my hearts yearning prayer to all of you! Shall you par-take in the divine lovers dance surrendering to our hearts completely entwined as never before?

By Emily Smedley <3
Helix Matrix Healing

Thanks to my lovers and dear womb sistars for the gifts to inspire me to share this completely, I love you all xoxo